Common oxymoron

There’s no other way to say it, no beating around the bush wasting time on eloquent prose or excuses; my parents screwed up. There, I said it…no apologies, no regrets. Not in a traditional multifaceted culture of abnormal norms sort of fashion, but in a very unconventional manner. Not a day goes by that I don’t curse them for their oversight in raising such an abomination to society such as myself.

Heaven forgive them for instilling…I shudder to even mention it…uncommon courtesy, and now I’m a twisted wreck of a man beyond common recognition.

I’m ashamed to mention that I voice my appreciation with a “Thank you” when someone takes the time to hold open a door for me. I hang my head every time I wave to a person that slows down to let me enter their lane on the freeway. My conscience weeps every time hold an elevator instead of repeatedly mashing the button to shut the doors.

Will I ever learn?

A man walking ahead of a woman reaches a door, pulls it open and steps aside for the woman to enter. The woman glances at him curtly and says, “You don’t need to hold the door open because I’m a lady.”

The man replies, “I didn’t, I held it open because I’m a gentleman.”